Tuesday, January 29, 2008

My perspective on finding a wife

I'm kind of sick of girls telling me I'll make "some" girl very happy. For me that kind of sloppy figuratism has reached a point where I can't (and refuse to) believe it. Please don't take offense by this, I just feel I have something to say in the area. It may be of some help to others.

I'm well aware that PRACTICALLY I am the ideal husband - I cook, I'm happy to clean, I enjoy music (making, dancing, etc.) and wish to have a Godly relationship (which is the only worthy kind of relationship). I make a decent salary (for now) and while I'm no hulk I'm not skinny either. Girls constantly tell me I have a great sense of rhythym and that I wish to share that with the one woman I will spend the rest of my life with. I will love with passion unfailing and will refuse to give anything but 100%. Please don't assume this is pride, it's not. God has surely blessed me and for it I am overjoyed and in order to be thankful I am aware of what I am thankful for. More importantly He granted me the gift of repentance unto knowing His Son. I can ask for no more and He gave anyway.

Just so you know - I am quite well aware of my flaws. I do not assume they do not exist. I'm smelly, messy at times (making me a hypocrite in addition) and I can be selfish. I make inappropriate jokes and comments and I have a problem noticing details that may be important. I also have anger issues and have a problem making eye contact. But surely to add to my good points is that I can be honest about myself. I am also prepared to put effort into correcting them.

I know that if I wait on the Lord His grace will abound and He will gift me as He pleases. I admit I desire the gift, but I know not to EXPECT it. If I have any testimony from scripture, it is those who trust in God that wind up with the greatest blessing in Him. I know that IF I wait and IF God gives me a wife, she will be beyond my expectations. However if I demand and lament God may (graciously) give to me in my impatience. That opens the door only to suffering, and I do not wish that on anyone, least of all on myself. If God keeps me single, it is only to His glory I live, and then to His glory I will die. I have been consoled on this issue. I need no other council.

By demanding what I want, I only find loss. In asking for what I need, I am constantly absorbed by the awesome love of God.

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